It’s 7:43am and you are pacing back and forth in the elevator that is headed to the 14th floor for your interview. Today is the day that you are interviewing for your first job out of college. As you pace nervously, in your not-yet-broken-in Steve Madden pumps, you anticipate the tough questions that will be thrown your way during the interview. You walk into the interview, and because you researched every aspect of the company, you nail every question. But, at the end of the interview, you are left feeling unknowledgeable. This is because you were dying to find out if the company offers paid maternity leave and whether sick days are docked from your vacation days. But, because the interviewer didn’t mention it, you didn’t ask—out of fear that you would come across as lazy. So, how exactly should you go about getting the answers to these questions, because let’s face it, paid leave is important and may help you make the decision between this job and the company that offered you a position last week. So, here’s how to get the inside scoop:

Once you are offered a position, prior to accepting, ask to see a copy of the benefits package. Asking during the interview may come across as too presumptuous. But, if an offer of employment is extended, you can ask to see the benefits prior to accepting the position. This way, you can learn about paid maternity leave and the details regarding vacation, without directly asking about time off. Now, rather than your future employer thinking you are lazy, your future employer thinks you are a mature candidate that wants to make an informed decision prior to accepting any offers.

Often times, we’re our biggest critic. We have a constant inner dialogue telling us that we aren’t good enough. But sometimes, we are so hard on ourselves that it undermines our efforts and prevents us from achieving our goals. Rather than looking in the mirror and calling yourself fat because you still haven’t lost the ten pounds you have been trying to lose, or telling yourself you will never be a successful business owner because it’s risky and you have a history of failure, tell yourself that no matter what obstacles you face, you will keep going.

Be gentle with yourself and realize that you’re doing just fine. Instead of beating yourself up, find ways to encourage yourself. What would you say to a close friend in your shoes? How would you comfort her? The same way you support and encourage those around you, should be the same way you support and encourage yourself.

More often than we would like to admit, we have apologized to someone at work for no reason at all. Without even realizing it, we say, “sorry” when there is no reason to apologize. For example:

You knock on your coworker’s door and when he says “come in” you say “sorry, I just have a quick question.”

Or, you’re leading a staff meeting and want to suggest an idea, so you say, “sorry, but I wanted to share a way that we can boost online sales.”

But why exactly are you sorry? In both of the above scenarios, there was no need to apologize. When you apologize repeatedly, simply because you are about to speak, it’s as if you’re saying “sorry for speaking.” In the workplace, you should never apologize for speaking up or offering an opinion. Rather than starting your sentences with an unnecessary apology, just speak.

As women, we are taught to avoid being intrusive, so we say sorry before we speak, thinking that it makes us sound more polite—but it doesn’t. It makes us sound timid and weak. Eliminating the unnecessary “sorry” will make us sound more confident, assertive, and competent. So, stop the gratuitous apologies and only tell people you are sorry when there is a legitimate reason to be sorry.